About to wed? Think about it.

Let’s face it, your wedding day is supposed to be one of your happiest moment. That is when you actually show your partner that you truly love her / him and that you want to spend the rest of your life together.

mrandmrssmithposter

But of course, not all will have a ‘happily ever after’ at the end – and to make sure that doesn’t happen, you need to carefully think and step with your 2 feet before commiting to this serious relationship. Here’s some advices which I would like to share and hopefully it will bring benefit to everyone that’s going into this life changing phase.

  • Get to really know your partner before getting married.It’s not about knowing what food she or he likes nor what is his or her favourite color (I will just treat the person as a ‘she’ moving forward). It’s about knowing her true identity and see if you can actually fit together.

    Saying things like ‘I love her so much and I will be like what she wants’ is like saying I will act like I am a mouse when I am a cat! And as far as everyone knows, a cat will remain as a cat! Meow!

    The only way to this is to know her – what’s her past time hobby is, what does she do when she’s bored, does she do housekeeping? What’s she like when she gets mad? What’s annoy her? What is it that she doesn’t like about you? I know these are hard especially if both of you just fell in love – because both of you aren’t showing your true colours and are just acting all the way because you wanted to be loved. Find it hard to believe? Ask yourself in the mirror! I can say 8 out of 10 acts in front of their partners.

    For muslims, make sure she is a religious person and that she does not miss her prayers. I had a friend once who said “it’s ok, I will guide her and fix what is broken” – but that is not the main point. The main point here is to get a perfect score even before you get married. Would you like to buy a faulty car when there’s a good one laying around? Of course not! Even if you have a perfect working car, there WILL be problems eventually afterwards that requires a fix!

    Her family? Get to know them. If you are marrying her, you are marrying her family as well! Some people tend to forget about this and just blinded by thinking that there’s only the two of you in your so called own world. Remember, they will bring a big impact to yourself if you are not careful enough. Understand the family culture, their lifestyles and such, so you can blend in with ease.

    What about her friends? See and find out how she treats you in front of them. If she acknowledges you as her boyfriend, keep eye to eye contact with you even when she talks to her friends, and doesn’t leave you out from the conversation, then that is a good start. If she never acknowledge you in front of her friends and leave you out of the conversation completely, you might want to buy a PSP or get yourself an Iphone to keep you occupied. Or that just shows that she doesn’t find you worthy and can dump you whenever she likes.

    Does she like what you like? You may like to hang out and go sightseeing when she finds it absolutely rubbish and boring. You like some peace and quiet and she usually finds herself at a disco with some bass thumping music. Now, if you two doesn’t get along that well in the start, what guarantees that both of you will tag along until the finish line? This will only lead to frustration, mainly because you can’t be doing what you like most with your partner and there’s a risk that someone else will come in and become her replacement for you! So find someone that shares the same interest, or at least doesn’t mind tagging along to your event. Remember, it’s a two way road, so you need to tag along to her events too whether you like it or not!

    A querrel or a fight? What is it like when she or you get mad? Does she hit you? Or does she run away, dissapear, and hide when you have any conflicts going on? If she can do that before marriage, trust me – it’s going to get worst after! So find someone who can handle conflict like an adult! A word of advice, if she hit you, dump her. You are not a punchbag!

    Sharing is caring. So does she shares her belongings with you and does she allow you to touch or use her belongings without her permission. Well, make sure she does as you going to have trouble later if she doesn’t.

Men thinks they will be the king and will be treated like a king too when they are married. And woman thinks they will be the queen and treated like a queen too when they are married.

Not even close! (unless you are marrying someone from a royal family that is… but then, even royals have their own problems).

The main point of getting married is sharing everything with your partner. The happiness, the wealth, the health, the sadness, the poor, and everything else together. Your partner is someone that supports you in everything that you do. Your partner is needed to complete something that you do not have – like you have a car, but do not have the key to start it, so your partner is the key for both of you to start the car and drive off to happyland.

Don’t be selfish. There will be lots of responsibilities when you get married, and don’t get conned by the romantic stories that you find on movies, they are – acting after all (and see how many actors and actress had divorced – scary figures!). You need to learn to appreciate each other, find the weaknesses of each other, and learn to accept and adapt to it. Everyone will have their own weakness, so you need to be forgiving to your partner, as you will never know how forgiving she is to you in the long run.

Last but not least, open your eyes! WIDE! Most of us do not realize that the best thing is actually in front of their eyes but are blinded  just because of some minor tiny weeny fault that wasn’t really a fault at all. Lay back, think again, or put yourself in her shoe, and please, do notice all the good things that she did for you – sometimes we are too ignorant on this and only focus on bad things thus seeing bad images of our partner and are more attracted to strangers – yes, complete strangers from outside. You think you know them (even if it’s your colleague or friend that you usually hang out with) but you actually know nothing in fact.

Hope that doesn’t scare you too much about getting married! And oh yes, the best part is you can do sex all you want and wherever you want of course 😛

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